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Asking For What you Need: The Fine Art of Negotiations

Imagine you are sitting down with a colleague or supervisor and said…”what I really need from you in order for me to thrive in my role is______”  Fill in the blank with any hosts of needs, such as:time, quiet, honest conversation, data to analyze, problems to solve, tasks to complete or even someone to mentor. In order to truly leverage our strengths, we must ask for what we need. Asking for what you need is one of the finer arts of negotiation.

We often think of negotiation through the lenses of salaries and benefits. SheNegotiates helps women with the art of negotiating.They believe that “the world needs what you have to offer.” Their training and coaching services help women to strategically work towards their professional and financial goals. SheNegotiates fills a critical role in helping women learn the art of negotiating. The team at SheNegotiates understands the importance of asking for what you need. [Read more…]

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Who Are the Hidden Figures in Your Community?

Hidden Figures ,a recently released film, is the true story of three brilliant African-American women working at NASA. Katherine Johnson, Dorothy Vaughn, and Mary Jackson were three mathematicians and engineers from the West Computer Group that helped launch John Glenn into orbit. These three women were often hidden from their colleagues and the public. Yet, they revealed the “hidden” numbers and equations that led to the successful launch of the Mercury 7 Friendship Capsule.

Hidden Figures is a powerful film that captures the story of the space race in the 1960’s. The themes are still relevant and timely. Political, economic and social divisions are boldly addressed in this film. There are history, race relations, gender issues, and math lessons for all audience members. The film invites us to wrestle with multiple questions. Three questions stood out for me.  [Read more…]

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The Power of Storytelling

I am a firm believer in the power of storytelling to help us make sense of organizations, people and communities. Here is one story that has stuck with me for years.

I was a science teacher in the early stages of my career. I taught prekindergarten through eighth grade science in Friends (Quaker) schools in Philadelphia area. My second graders had worked for months on a science project and we were now ready to share the results with the parents. Invitations were sent out and we planned a big celebration on the school stage for all the parents to attend. The children had written a play to share their science journey as they loved to perform. They were proud, confident and eager to share their story with their parents. [Read more…]

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A Cairn for Shifting Away From Blame

Are you a Blamer?  Do you know a Blamer?

Brene’ Brown names the reality of blame in her short animated video. Have you ever been blamed of something by a loved one?  Heard others blaming someone in your organization? Perhaps, you’ve even blamed someone?

Brene’ Brown’s series of video shorts are wonderful for sparking engaging conversations about topics we don’t usually talk about. Her video on Blame is a wonderful way for us to shift from blame to accountability.

Blame  seems to be so present in our current politically charged media. It’s also present in some organizations and communities.  Perhaps this video can serve as a Cairn for finding a better way forward.   [Read more…]

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Topophilia for Times of Transition

The term topophilia was coined by the geographer Yi-Fu Tuan of the University of Wisconsin and is defined as the affective bond with one’s environment—a person’s mental, emotional, and cognitive ties to a place. During a transition we need topophilia.

A strong sense of place can help us weather the storm of questions that emerge during a transition….where will I work?  how will I pay my rent?  who will be my friends? or one of my favorites stated by many a millennial and baby boomer…”What do I want to be when I grow up? ”

Aldo Leopold, like contemporary nature essayists Gary Snyder and Annie Dillard, see places as defined not merely by its appearance and topographical features. “It must be recognized for its essential qualities, those forces that give a place its life, its ‘beingness.’ ” Our topophilia places often give us our “beingness” during transition. [Read more…]

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Bubble Soccer Leadership Style

Imagine stepping into a bubble with handles and a brace around your shoulders. The bubble surrounds you. You step onto the field to play soccer and all your colleagues are in bubbles. The first kick of the ball and you are running with a protective bubble around you. No worries, if you fall, you bounce.

As a leader do you bounce back up after a challenge?  How can you incorporate bubble soccer into your leadership style?  What can leaders learn from bubble soccer?

[Read more…]

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User Manual for Leaders and Teams

Are you one of those people who reads “User Manuals” when you get a new piece of technology?  Maybe you did some experimenting but eventually looked at the user manual for your computer,printer or camera. Perhaps, by using the “manual” you were able to use your technology faster, more efficiently and with less frustration.

Reframe the “manual” concept and imagine a “User Manual for Leaders and Teams”.   David Politis, Founder and CEO of BetterCloud, shared this idea with Adam Bryant of the New York Times. Bryant’s article summarized the concept in his article “The CEO’s User Manual”. The concept is simple but very powerful. A new CEO writes a “user manual” on how to work with him/her. In this manual, the CEO might reference the best way to communicate with him/her, what drives him/her nuts, and perhaps even how the CEO likes to receive feedback. This one page document is shared with everyone on the leadership team. Immediately, there is no guessing and there is an opportunity to connect more quickly with the CEO to ensure success.

What if you take the concept one more step and everyone in the organization has a page in the User Manual?  Meet Third Plateau, a social impact strategy firm. They are leading the way with adopting a team user manual.

[Read more…]

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Peter Principle Reversed

Imagine this…You started out in a position where you grew into the role and eventually just loved your job. You got to do what you loved every day.  You applied your talents, skills, knowledge and you were highly engaged, productive and happy in your role. Maybe you were a nurse and got to serve patients every day, or maybe you were a teacher and you loved curriculum design, or maybe you were a mechanic and you loved working on cars. Then one day,  someone said to you….You are so great at what you do we’d like to promote you to be a manager, supervisor, principal, or some other title of leadership.

It feels like such a compliment. As you grow in your role you find yourself spending less time doing what you love and not falling in love with the tasks of being a manager. In fact, you find yourself burning out. One day you wake up and say secretly,  “I  know the team needs me right now but I sure wish I was still a………nurse, teacher, mechanic, __________”. This is the Peter Principle. People get promoted right out of their greatest talents and strengths and end up in roles that are not a great match to their talents.  [Read more…]

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To Be Humble To Be Kind

After the Newtown, Connecticut shooting, a group of resilient community members launched a nonprofit called Newtown Kindness. Their mission is to ” to promote kindness as a guiding principle of humanity.”  The organization aims to facilitate “acts of kindness within communities as well as raise awareness of kindness through education, sharing and recognition.”  Their focus is primarily on youth but as leaders they invite us into kindness.

The band, Alternate Routes’ invites us to explore kindness even further.  “Nothing More” served as a their rallying call for Newtown Kindness. Their song begins:  “To be humble, to be kind it is the giving of peace in your mind”. They refrain “We are Love, We are One, We are how we treat each other when the day is done”.

It’s a song that sticks with you. Their song invites us to ask…what is the role of being humble and being kind in one’s leadership roles and responsibilities?  [Read more…]